Thursday, September 28, 2006

Iran's Get Rich Quick Scheme and Terrell Owens

Earlier today Iran's President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad said there was no way his country would stop its nuclear activity and oil prices immediately jumped almost $2 per barrell.

On a much less serious level, is the saga told in Dallas over the past day with Terrell Owens attempting to commit suicide, maybe.

First Iran.

Ahmadinejad has no intention to ever stop trying to develop the bomb. The UN and EU can talk with Iran till the cows come home. It won't matter. This research delivers more value per pound for Iran then all the oil buried beneath that third world hell hole. The mere mention of continuing the research alters the worlds oil price, thus pouring more money into Iran's coffers which can be used to buy off the huge number of poor, unemployed Iranians that fill the hell hole. This is extremely important to Ahmadinejad because if these people get pissed enough they could decide to rise up and hang him from the nearest light pole.

For all we know Ahmadinejad could be pulling a Saddam on us andlying about having a nuclear program. He knows that the U.S. cannot attack him unless the evidence is so overwhelming that even Kofi Anan would give his OK, so why not create a hypothetical nuclear program. The benefits are obvious. Nukes in the Gulf scare the bejesus out of the locals, and that is always a good thing when your main goal in life is to become a regional super power.

Finally, the occasional threat keeps Ahmadinejad face in the news. I think he enjoys being the world's bad boy. He has mastered the coat and tie-less shirt look that makes him look semi-respectable, but still one of the masses. After all what self-respecting revolutionary would ever wear a tie. Fidel doesn't, Mao didn't. His appearance so perfectly states, "Hey, I have to wear a jacket and nice shirt so the other world leaders will take me seriously, but like you all I hate wearing ties."

Ahmadinejad must have a great publicist.

Speaking of publicity let's move on to TO.

I think we can chalk up his latest shennigans as another silly stunt. After all, TO is a Grade A narcissist. Anyone who loves himself that much is unlikely to kill themself.

I think TO decided it was time to put his face back on the front page of the Dallas M0rnining News and what better way to garner some quick sympathy then by trying to appear so depressed that suicide became an option. Of course, he instantly denied his suicidal tendencies, but he gave enough clues to the EMTs to make it sound legit. His next day denial simply made the story more interesting guaranteeing more media coverage.

The fact that his publicist was in his house when all this took place, to me, points to it being a PR move. After all who hangs with their publicicist? Maybe people do. I don't have one so I really can't say if they are fun to be with. If the person making the 911 call was a teammate or neighbor then it would have been more believable, but then again those people would know better then to stage something like this.

But hey, I'm just guessing.


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